i hate hate hate hate my job.
It’s been awhile since I had an all out I-hate-my-job rant, but I really, really, REALLY hate my job. Going into work every day is a miserable experience, and all the people are miserable and hate their jobs as well. We’re under a budget crunch (like many places), so hours are being cut where they can which makes it harder to do your job correctly and, more importantly in the eyes of the hospital, efficiently. Housekeeping hours have been cut…our hospital was already kind of dirty. Hours for the transporters have been cut…so now I have to run my own blood work to the lab or run to pick my blood products or take my patients to the x-ray department. And I have 3-4 other patients to care for at the same time. We pretty much NEVER have a nursing assistant, but apparently we’re never going to have one again…I don’t think we even have one who is assigned to work on my floor for my shift anymore. They would have to be pulled from another floor. How ridiculous is that? I don’t mind taking vital signs and doing accuchecks, but it’s often a matter of time (that’s two extra trips into a patient’s room!). Also, everyone is so busy that even finding someone to help you turn and/or change a patient can be difficult. I was turning large patients on my own one day this week…I’m little and I’m sure I’m killing my back.
My dinner usually consists of me shoving my food down my throat in ten minutes or less (but we get half an hour deducted from our pay every day). My “care” is absolutely terrible at times because it’s more about the clock and getting out on time than actually taking care of patients. Why was I late? Well, I had to call the pharmacy twelve times to get my medication out (no really, I call the pharmacy at least five times per day…rarely is anything put in correctly). We didn’t have supplies so I had to track them down on another floor. My patient was incontinent six times and every time I have to find someone who has the time to help me change them.
I feel like an idiot most of the time and don’t even feel competent, although some people say I’m a “good nurse.” I don’t believe them at all.
I understand that not everything is going to be set up perfectly, so I don’t expect it to be. But day after day of the same frustrations is killing me and I really can’t take it much more. Is it too much to expect to work on the floor where you were hired? Or to eat dinner? I hate where I work and I hate my job and I hate nursing and I have NO idea why anyone would ever want to be a nurse. Not every nurse in the world is miserable so it must not be too terrible….but it’s really hard to see that now. I know I should try a different nursing job before I completely abandon it (because there is so much to do in nursing!), but I don’t even want to try. I hate it that much.
That being said, I have applied to other jobs, but many want at least one year experience, which I am about two months shy of. I suppose I could hold on for two more months. I’ve made it this far…although I really, really just want to quit.
That’s all. I love how people say “but you’re such a happy, positive person!” Really? REALLY? Where did you get that from?
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I wish I could be a professional runner…I’m thinking health promotion or something would be much more exciting. (Although at the opposite spectrum of the bakery…) I’m getting good at it these days although I’m taking today off since my throat is killing me and I’m kind of achy. However, Thursday I had an AMAZING run. It was about 40 degrees outside, which clearly means it was time to break out the shorts. Twelve miles in shorts and a long sleeve shirt…some of my favorite running weather! Dare I say I even got a little warm out there. 
I was worried how my legs would feel after my awesome workout since they were kind of tired just walking around, but they snapped right back into run mode. It was my day off and I loooooove longer-ish runs, so yay! It was perfect.
Thursday, March 4
12.05 miles in 1:32:04, avg pace of 7:39
Marathon pace, please??? I felt great and my last miles were much faster than my first few miles. I know there’s a long way to go after 12 miles, but I think that’s a pretty good start! I can’t believe Boston is in six weeks…that’s crazy. I’m hoping to kick this cold or whatever I have since I have a big training week coming up.
Do you want me to come down there and yell at them?
I was brainstorming bakery names on my drive home last night.
Coincidentally I have 2 more months school left. A SIIIIIIIGN!!!!
On a more serious note…It breaks my heart to hear you are so miserable at work. I hope another job opportunity shows up on your doorstep soon. Think happy bakery thoughts, Susan!
Susan…
That’s the other thing…maybe get a 12 hour shift…easier to get things done in 12 hours than 8. And if you work 3-11, you work THE toughest shift there is. So maybe get a different shift. Just suggestions.
Reading your rant sounds like me talking to myself during my shifts. I can relate in so many ways. In fact I was getting so frustrated that I was getting wicked snappy to other people that I work with. Thankfully I’ve never taken it out on a patient, but the minute I leave a patient’s room a complaint about the way the hospital is run is on my tongue. It makes me so mad because I KNOW that I am normally not that kind of person…meaning grumpy and cross and therefore it makes me EVEN MORE down. It’s hard to get out of a mood like that. And it can really make you hate your job and not want to go into work. And believe me, when you don’t want to go in, you are almost asking for a bad night…I highly believe that your attitude is more than half the battle. Just commiserating with you.
As for me…I was working on a med-surg floor…where there is the highest nurse:patient ratio as well as the lowest nurse:aide ratio. I recently transferred to IMC (Intermediate Care) and I have found that things (at least so far) seem to be much better…more support for the nurses and more help. So maybe you really do need to just find a different place to work. I know it seems like nothing will get better for a long time, but hopefully it will. You are doing things to make it better. Hold on for two more months.
But I do agree with you. I don’t know why anyone would want to be a nurse. It’s a tough job, with a high level of responsibility, and the pay definitely doesn’t match how much you put into it. And to think that I went into this not even knowing what it was about! What a surprise I had!
The only thing I like about my job are my days off
If you ever want to chat…kaye@thetruthisavirus.com
Keep your chin up. Do you at least have good co-workers? For me, that makes ALL the difference.
ohh it makes me sad that it’s so bad! i hope you are applying far and wide (including NC!? come on DO IT!). could you potentially do outpatient work, or work for an area that has to do with health promotion (WIC or something like that?) but still use the nursing skills?
i really hope you can find a better situation fast! that said, i think you should try to stick it out the 2 more months. it’s not too long — just think! you’ll be done by the time it’s really hot out. i’ve been through so many crappy months that i’ve hated (PICU UGHGHGHGH) but in retrospect, it all seems just like a little blip in time.
I’ve just passed the two-year mark at my job, and I’m feeling the same as you for many of the same reasons. I’m keeping my eyes open and looking for other positions now that I have those years under my belt. I’m pretty sure I don’t want to work in another hospital. The only problem is that for all the cons my job has, it has one big pro that I don’t find in non-hospital jobs: flexibility. I like to take time off through the year. I think in the last year I was off nearly two and a half months total. I already have another two weeks planned, and that’s just through May. Who knows? I may be sticking around long enough to pick up the last of my sign-on bonus. At my hospital, its actually more of a retention bonus since they split up the payments over three years.
Susan, I can tell from reading this post that you ARE a wonderful nurse, because you obviously care. But that doesn’t make the fact that the job is exhausting and completely draining any better. I hope something comes back from the resumes you sent out. You do owe it another try, and if that doesn’t work, no biggie! Like you said a few days ago, you are young and there are a lot of other opportunities out there for you!
Girl, you must find a new job! Who wouldn’t be miserable with those conditions?!? I would be miserable. I can’t believe you are having such a hard time finding a job! Here in Memphis, and all around the south I believe, are tons of job openings! I don’t know anyone who had issues finding a nursing job where they wanted to work with no experience so the nine months you have worked definitely count for something!Guess you better come down south so you can find a job! Haha. And seriously, consider ICU, whether it be adults, peds, NICU, whatever. Patient ratio is amazing and it seems like everyone in every ICU I’ve been to is such a team player. You have to be. So that’s my 2 cents, let me know if you need anything or just want to chat! Don’t give up on nursing just yet girl, but definitely get rid of that awful job as soon as you can! *hugs*
Work woes (yours and mine) make me think of my favorite quote from Revolutionary Road: “maybe it does take a certain amount of guts to see the emptiness, but it takes a whole hell of a lot more to see the hopelessness. And I guess when you do see the hopelessness, that’s when there’s nothing to do but take off. If you can.”
Point being (and speaking as someone who has now wasted YEARS in a job they hate) take whatever out you get without feeling like you do need to try another nursing job if its truly not what you want to do. If you’re in the position where you can do a pay cut, take what interests you and don’t look back.
Susan, I’m so sorry about your job! I know it can be crippling to despise something you have to do and can’t get away from it! I’ll be praying for a better opportunity to come your way!
Do not give up on nursing! You must have went into this for a reason and had a passion for it at one point. I know it feels like there is nothing good about it and hard to see the light, but i hated my first nursing job, too. I don’t want to push the ICU, but seriously, if you’re interested, it wouldn’t hurt to try it
And if you’re two months away from one year experience, i wouldn’t worry about it. That is awesome. I was almost in the exact situation when i applied for the critical care internship.
Some people might not think it matters, but maybe look for a Magnet hospital? i work for one and I do think it makes a difference. http://rn.modernmedicine.com/rnweb/Career+Tips/Magnet-hospitals/ArticleStandard/Article/detail/390251
I don’t even know what to say about your job….so I won’t.
Let’s instead discuss your blistering 12 mile pace, shall we?
Long sleeve shirt and shorts is my FAVE weather to run in. I can’t wait until it gets here.
Hi there – it’s my first time commenting here, but having just uttered your post title MANY times in the past couple of months, I had to speak up. I don’t know anything about nursing, but I know how awful it feels to be stressed out in a job that feels wrong. And I also know that when I started taking real, concrete steps (like applications) to move on, I felt better immediately. Which is not to say that everything is hunky dory, but it makes things feel less hopeless.
Um. Yeah! Nice run, by the way.
Hi there! Here’s my two cents…
- Stick out the two months. It may seem like an eternity now, but in the scheme of your working lifetime, it’s nothing.
- Try another setting/location before giving up nursing. It sounds trite, but atmosphere matters SO MUCH at work. Even the same job can seem like night and day based on the setting.
- Try exploring some potential career changes as hobbies first. For example, try doing volunteer wellness counseling or doing custom cupcake orders, etc.
Maybe some part of that will help?!?!?!
Good luck… I don’t think any of us have it all figured out
I have to agree with several of the other comments and say that you should give ICU nursing a try. I am a PICU nurse in NC and I love my job (most of the time anyway). Reading your entry and seeing what you have to go through every shift…no wonder you hate it. I think if you switched units you could have the potential to like your job…and really, could it be any worse than where you are now? Give ICU a try! I really enoy your blog, as I am a nurse who loves to run as well. Keep it up!
If you’re only two months away from a year several places will round up and totally count that. And if you’re sick of nursing you don’t have to give it another go. If you found something else you might like better, why torture yourself with another nursing job. Life’s too short to be miserable.
Susan, did you have any doubts about going into nursing while you were in school for it? I’m in an accelerated BSN program right now (I, too, have a bachelor’s in another field) and I already question whether this is really what I want to do with my life. I’m just curious if you had any similar feelings before you actually entered the field. I find myself dreading clinical when I feel as if I should like it if nursing is what I want to do. I just need insight from someone in the field.
Oh my gosh..are you sure you aren’t working where I work? I could agree with EVERYTHING you said…
It almost sounds like me at 10am this morning!! I completely relate to what your saying, I get pulled in all directions on every shift, paperwork paperwork oh and more paperwork of course, oh by the way we’re going to take one of the people on your shift today and shove them somewhere else, but make sure you do everything on time! I’m so so so fed up with it all every time I go into work, I want to specialise but can’t at the moment, keep on with the blogs!!
Wow! I have three family members who are nurses and the complaints keep pouring in over this overrated profession. I am actually in the process of turning in my application for RN school. I was in last fall and got really sick so I had to reapply. While this year has gone by I have been really wondering if the job is even worth doing. I love people, but I don’t like bitchy family members, rude docs, hurry up and do everything now and the thought of Oh My…please don’t die on my shift! Ugh……!!!! I am seriously reconsidering this professional path.
I feel your pain sister. I have been at it for 21 years, I’ll be 40 soon and life is too short. I even got out of the floor racket for something more administrative and the grass ain’t no greener. But the money isn’t bad, the benefits are rock solid (unless that is under fire) and I think all of us went into this field because deep down , we care about people, not to mention, we have a genuine soul. On the other hand, turds manage to last in this job just as much, go figure. My thought is this (and I am trying to do something like this). Can you manage to work 3 or 4 eight-hour shifts? Not 12, not 10, eight. This would provide you with some critically needed down time from the circus you call work. It would provide you some work-life balance. I think the 40 hour week is a crock of #$%^, whoever decided that this was the norm, was a real dink. If you can’t work 3 or 4 eights and need some supplemental income, wouldn’t one day a week as something else provide it for you? Could you imagine working in a garden center once a week, or teaching group fitness classes as a way to infuse doing what you love? Give it some thought. I wish i had that option, I am now salaried and have to carry a pager. i am not protected by the union, so if they want me to work over 40 hours a week, they can justify it and do just that. I’d be a lot happier if they would only less us work a 4 day week. well, good luck and i think it’s really apparent that many of us feel your pain!!
I hate nursing. I am a new GN who works at a non-profit hospital, the only african-american nurse on my unit and I hate it. I went into nursing to help sick people. I did not know I would have to sign up for High school bull s###. I have a great work schedule (weekends only 12′s) and off 4 days a week, make great money ($30.00hr), so why am I so miserable? It’s not the patients and their families nor the MD’s or administration. It’s other nurses!!!! I showed up for work one day and the nurses on 1st shift stop speaking to me, they roll their eyes at me, one nurse got really snippy with me because I didn’t give her a report that was up to her standards (I’ve been orienting on the floor for 8 weeks now). I wanted to say something to her, but I kept quiet for fear I will make more enemies. I worked so hard in Nursing school, graduated with honors, winning an award for nursing at school, getting the dream job I always wanted, and now this!!!!! Now I hate going to work because I know when morning comes I have to deal with these ignorant women on 1st shift. Already I want to quit but my family keeps telling me to hang in there it will get better, but I know it won’t!!! What should I do????
I totally understand what your going through as a new grad. Isn’t horrible that we worked so hard to in nursing school and everything seemed so promising. I’ve been a nurse for almost 3 years, and I still get those nauseous feelings before going to work even to the point of crying! I dont know what it is. Maybe I rather work in the clinic. lol But then I have to think that all these people in america are getting laid off and we have a great paying job and it’s in demand, it’s hard, and I swear there should be a support group for nurses so we can vent out our emotions. By the time you see this message, your def one year already. It’s gets a little better but once you hit that one year mark, you need to treat yourself on a vacation for all the hard work. Keep it up, I know you can do it!
I have been a RN for 10 years and have worked in both Med/Surg and Pediatrics. Med/Surg was horrible. 8-9 patients to one nurse and 1 care partner for 39 bed floor. Patients were huge and I am tiny and always hurting my back. The only redeeming thing was that the hospital was union and benefits were great. Now I work Pediatrics 3-5 pt to nurse ratio. MUCH better. Still never have a care partner, but most patients are small enough for me to handle. Problem with this job is benefits are terrible and administration aweful. I think there are problems no matter where you are with this profession, you just have to pick your battle. Me, I will take the horrible benefits and administration to have my day to day work be tolerable and my coworkers are usually very helpful. Good coworkers makes a world of difference.
Hi,
I have been a nurse for seven years and HATE the hospital as well!
No help, no lunch or dinner. Can’t drink because you don’t have time to go to the bathroom. When u finally feel like you are going to pass out, you go into the kitchen and shove something down your throat. I am not only the nurse, but also expected to be the CNA,Garbage woman, transporter, lab, secretary etc. there is NEVER enough help. I end up doing CNA work myself because by the time you find the CNA she is either busy, out for a smoke, or gives you an attitude. The hospitals don’t care that someone’s family member hasn’t been turned all night or is sitting in a dirty diaper or hasn’t gotten pain meds cause you just got a post op and a new admission and your other 6 patients have issues( low blood sugar, low 02 sat).
The hospitals only take notice if something really goes wrong like if someone dies or complains.
No one cares that you have so much paperwork that by the time you’re done and round on your patients you hope and pray they Aare still breathing. By the time your shift is done, which is usually an hour late because there is always some disaster that takes place before you are able to leave, you spend your time in the car worrying about what you didnt do or if you missed something. And then you don’t sleep because you have anxiety about what the next horrible shift will bring!!
Oh yeah, great job, surely worth mid 30′s an hour! Not!! At least you’ll know you will always have a job because there is always someone to quit. I have worked at numerous different hospitals and it is no different anywhere.
Anyway, now I am doing home care and somewhat happier. Pay is a little lower, but at least I have my sanity!!
I would NEVER recommend anyone to become a nurse!!!
It is so painful to read all these posts. I totally understand where you all are coming from. Whether we are LPNs or RNs, we all experience this. So much is expected of us but we are not given the tools or resources to do what we need to do within the time we are working. We work odd shifts, work holidays, work short and work mandatory overtime. We are physically and mentally exhausted. I know that not all nursing jobs are like this, but unfortunately many are. But we do have choices even when we don’t see them. I am very into business and have started a website called NursesHaveChoices.com . I want nurses to see there is another way. I wish everyone luck in their jobs and futures. It’s so hard when you feel like you have no control. You may not be able to change the job situation, but you can change your future.
I would NEVER NEVER NEVER recommend anyone become a registered nurse in the USA. DO NOT waste your time and money investing in a career that is dead end. I have been an RN for 15 years, have my BSN. Managers do not back you up, you have to work with many an unlicensed personnel that have responsibilities than only an RN should have. The healthcare system in this country is in a crisis mode and hospitals and long term care facilities are scrambling to make a buck any way they can….that means cutting corners and having state legislators pass laws that increase the patient load more and more for nurses. It is a shame and many many people are getting substandard care and are dying because of it.
Nurses are so bogged down that now family members (if the patient has any) has to call the in-housee 911 number to get a doctor in the room if the patient has become unstable….no longer is the nurse the first line of defense. WHAT A JOKE. They are putting unstable patients on med-surg floors, patients that should be in an ICU step down…and expected the RNs to carry a load of 8-10 at night at some hospitals in my area.
Agreed…I have been a nurse for almost 4 years, and when people ask me what I love most about it, I have no idea what to say. I just don’t have anything GOOD to say about nursing. I constantly wonder if I’ve made a bad choice by becoming an RN. The pay is ok, but is this how I have to spend the rest of my life? I just can’t stand it. The hours, the constant fear of messing something up or losing my license…missing my kids opening their Christmas gifts, the grumpy doctors, overworked staff, the short handed shifts, the patients who’s pain I am supposed to be alleviating just becomes annoying after a while. Oh, Mr. Whoever in bed 14-a needs another effing pain pill. None of us go into nursing feeling this way. We want to “help people”. It becomes exhausting. I literally hate nursing, but have a family to raise. So, I do it. We all do it. But does anyone really love it? I’d have to say not.
Run, Run, Run away from ‘Nursing’ as fast as you can!!!
ICU/ER/REHAB/MS/TELE/NEURO…WTF EVER….it is ALL stinking, steaming Horse Potatoes! Have some self-respect and quit!
By the way- RN since 1995. What a waste of my one and only life!
Professional N!gger is what it should most accurately be called, not ‘RN’— how can someone have a job that is named after a bodily function? Nursing is what one does to feed babies. I should have quit after the first day on the job back in June 1995, when I had my very first thought to do so.
These responders who say just try something else- go ahead, do so, and you will see that GiGi has hit the nail right on the head. Bam!
Run, run run as fast as you can from this job! Haven’t you all noticed? This is a business. Not being a nurse but the schools for nursing. No one cares anymore. It is a business. When they have finished off the younger people and they find out how horrible nursing really is……..the money makers will be on to a new scam!
I have been a nurse since June of 2009. I started out on a physical rehab/stroke/post surgical floor working midnights, and hated the high patient ratio (8-10) and lack of any help on the floor. We typically had 18-24 patients on our unit, and would have 2 or 3 nurses, 1 or 2 aides, and no clerk or other help. I transferred to a procedural area, and it was great for a long time. Then our hours started getting cut, and same with the staff. I left and went to another hospital in another procedural area, and bombed out after a few months. I was blamed for things that happened to a couple of patients hours after they had left my care, and that really upset me, both as a nurse, and as a human being. Blame gets shifted around so many times, and seems to stick with whoever is considered to be the weakest link in the chain. I went into nursing as a second career in my late 30′s, and am starting to feel that it was a huge mistake. I do want to help people, but not at the expense of my own health and sanity. I think we need to start a support group for nurses who are frustrated and depressed with their career!!
you bring up memories when i started(1996). you might get a break and end up in a part of nursing you can engage passionately. it happens over and over. the frustrations will not end, but may be subdued by an area where you are very engaged. consider perseverance in this light.
(i ended up an er nurse, charge, and helicopter flight)